It's getting hot in Hollyweird, and to save money on air conditioning I've taken to wandering around Target where it's nice and cool. I've spent quite a bit of time (and money) lurking in the book section. Where I'm still yelling at the books. It's not their fault they have stupid covers (Unless we're talking about Glenn Beck, and then he deserves all the being left in the douche section he can get!) but still...
We're nowhere near Baen territory with these, they're not terrible in and of themselves, but someone needs to hatch a new idea once in awhile. It's your job to make books look different from other books. If every book is going to look like every other book, why bother to put them in aisles based on what's actually written in them? Here, I'll make things easier. Then publishers don't have to worry their little heads about whether the book in front of them is non-fiction or romance. They can just glance at the cover between cocktails and throw it into one of the following piles:
Walkin' Around Outside!
Who Cares About Nature and Shit? Let's Get the Fuck Outta Here!
Holdin' Hands!
Brides Without Heads!
EVERY PAIR OF FEET IN THE WORLD.
and finally...
Books That Were Apparently Written by Me!
I must have written this around 2003, when I was sure I'd picked the best stage name ever. Then I realized I'd have two first names, and that's just stupid. It seems, however, that in addition to auditioning for The Crow 4 and modelling wedding dresses on a Utah morning show, I wrote a book. So I'm 1 for 3.
Too bad about that Crow 4 thing, though. I thought I really nailed that audition.
