I give up, HOW MANY Spidermen fit inside a Jamba Juice?

Cars of a Feather Park Together

I took myself down to Awesome Town a few days ago--whoops, I meant Halloween Town--for some well-deserved spooky retail therapy. As I strolled out after openly lusting after basically EVERYTHING in the store, I noticed a funny coincidence. Next to my beloved Skate Betty was another Saturn*. I thought, "Well that's fun." Then, I noticed the antenna ball on this Saturn:



Then I looked at my antenna ball:




Awesome. Our cars are best friends.

*License plates are none of yo damn business. Stop gaping at our automobiles' lady business.

Real Life Facebook.

Why do the Brits come up with the funniest of funnies? First all the sexy accents, then all the good chocolate, now this. Why am I not in England yet?

Beach Boys, how far you have fallen...

Meet one of the best late-night commercials ever to grace the airwaves! Old ladies! Old dudes! Wheelchairs! Shady forest bridges! Ain't nothing sadder than a sad sad product commercial trying to be happy. Also, the synchronized wheeling. I see these things in Walmart all the time, and NO ONE is doing any sort of choreography. I guess they accidentally threw away the dance step instructions with the actual assembly instructions.

On Gingerbread Gay Weddings, and How I've Ruined Them

Hello dear chums and internet stalkers,

This week I decided to take a stand AND further my crafting skills. I decided to join my friend NoNo Fourballs (Noelle to you chumps) in preparing and assembling a gingerbread house from scratch...and by "scratch" I mean we bought a discount $5 make-your-own-gingerbread-house kit. I decided that ours would be no generic, pansy-ass gingerbread house. It would stand for something. It would be a GINGERBREAD GAY WEDDING CHAPEL. Take THAT, Prop 8!

Unfortunately, someone found out. And that dastardly individual used his deadly hate-crime mind control to make the two of us forget to put confectioners sugar in the frosting to thicken it. So our CHAPEL OF LOVE became THE WRECKAGE OF DREAMS.



And I was pretty tore up about it. Then we got distracted and didn't care anymore. But hey, here's the evidence. I, Loli, tried my skills at homemakery.

Let that be a lesson to you.

Have YOU Found Raptor Jesus?

I myself have. On Google. While doing one of my usual searches for "Jesus with Dinosaurs" as per my usual creation museum stalkage.



So there you have it. Raptor Jesus. I've found pictures...but I have no idea where the hell it came from. As with "Are Your Base Are Belong To Us" jokes in days past, I need an explanation. Anyone? Anyone?

Anyway, its hilarious. Also, so is this, my latest google find from (I'm guessing) a kids biblical coloring book or hilarious mashup of a coloring book:



Kooky they may be, you gotta hand it to them, those creationist evangelicals/weird photoshop chucksters know how to make Jesus seem super-awesome.

What does it do again?

Oh look, a normal everyday massage chair on sale at Walmart!



But wait.....does a normal massage chair promise THIS?




Does it absorb souls?

Does it put ghosts back into their bodies?

Who told these people that the only thing standing between the living and the undead was tight shoulder and back muscles?

I'll tell you one thing....

I am NEVER sitting in this thing. Any inanimate object that claims to have the power to create life is all kinds of wrong. Maybe built with an ancient amulet inside? Maybe absorbing energy for some sort of evil warlock? Maybe plugging you into the matrix?